Jackie: "Alright, I'll come, but then I think I may go home." I can't stay here any longer. I don't want to give him any false hope.
But I do wish it was a date...
He's pretty quiet as we get into his car, an old beat up yellow thing. I notice something stuck between the dash and the windshield on the passenger side. I reach to get it. "What's this?" I say as I grab it, it being a small bottle of nail polish. His grip on the wheel tightens. "A memento from my ex," he says, deadly quiet.
Oh. Now I know why he does what he does. I'm silent for a couple seconds. "Well, this is an ugly shade anyway," so I throw it out the window. I see him smile just a little bit.
Dinner's pretty good, even though we just go to a little diner. After we pay (separately), he walks out the door without even waiting for me. "Hey, what gives?" I tease him.
He turns. "It's just--it's nothing," he says quickly. "Don't worry about it. Let's go home." He starts to walk to the car.
Bryce: I can't be in this diner any longer. I totally forgot that this was the chain where I learned everything that happened. It was only when I saw the check that I remembered.
God, fuck her. I walk out. I can't stay in there. "Hey, what gives?" I hear Jackie's voice behind me.
Should I tell her? "It's just-"
NO. Not yet. "It's nothing, don't worry about it. Let's go home." I turn to walk to the car and she follows. The ride home is silent. When we're close to home, she speaks up. "I'll walk you back upstairs, I wanna do one final spot check before I leave,"
That's fine. Stay as long as you want. I nod.
After she checks all the nooks and crannies of my apartment one last time, she gets ready to go. "Thanks for doing this for me, it means a lot."
God, please don't leave. I really don't want you to go. "Anything I can get you before you go?"
Anything, please say something.
"No thanks, I think I'll just be on my way. Call me if you need help, if you need someone to talk to, or if you just want to hang out."
Fuck. No. She reaches to give me a hug goodbye.
I can't take it anymore. I wrap my arms around her and bring her up to me in a kiss. She doesn't really seem into it at first, but then she relaxes.
Please don't go.
Jackie: I hate that I wanted this.
But God, he's such a good kisser. I tense up and then let go. This is the last time, I may as well make it count.
He lets me go. "Shit, Jackie, I'm so sorry. I know you don't want to do this, but I like you. You're the only girl I've liked since my ex, and she fucked me up bad. I'm sorry, I just had to get that out of my system."
I stare up at him. His eyes are frantic, eyebrows knit.
He means it. "It's okay."
Okay, this is really the last time.
I pull him back to me in one last, final kiss. I try to tell him that in this kiss, that this is the last time. He seems...almost desperate. I feel so bad, my heart almost breaks.
He's really unraveling, isn't he. But I can't be around for this. He needs to shape up without me. And then I'll let this happen. But until then, no. I pull apart from him. "Goodbye, Bryce." I gather my things and leave. I try not to cry as I briskly walk back to my own apartment, one block away.
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Thanks to mypalsim1 and others at MTS for the poses!
